Artists struggle as they try to balance their desire for relationship with the many real and perceived drawbacks of relationship. Some come to feel that they do best with a partner whom they see relatively rarely—and then they wonder if that is really a completely satisfactory solution. For example, Coco explained:

“An artist’s desire to keep things interesting, alive, spontaneous, independent and free: that’s me. Those are exactly the reasons why I shy away from longer-term relationships or the idea of marriage. I’m not sure I’m capable of compromising any of those things, no matter how much I love the other person. I’m afraid of commitment because I know myself and I know that I have a powerful need for change.

“Luckily my current partner, who is living half-way across the globe, feels exactly the same way. He is an artist who very much needs and loves his own space and independence. He, too, wants to know who he is and what his life would be like without the influence of a full-time partner. We love being together when we’re together and I feel lucky to have someone who is so like me and who understands my needs.”

“I’ve noticed, though, that we never seem to be creative at the same time. He seems to be less inspired to do his work when he is with me. I feel like he is losing out on more when he is with me, no matter how much I encourage and support him. I do wish that our situation could be different and that we could be creative together. I would love one day to feel more like part of a team rather than on my own with a boyfriend who most of the time is thousands of miles away; and who, when he’s with me, is kind of itching to get away again.”

What are your thoughts? Do live-apart relationships work? Leave a comment or drop me a line to and let me know your thoughts!

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