“This book delivers what it promises–it has already changed my response to two separate incidents of criticism that threw me off track recently. I like Maisel’s tone, which conveys compassion but at the same time gently pushes the reader to face some hard truths and take responsibility and control. The exercises have helped me zero in on my weakest areas and see how I might take criticism–and give it–in a more constructive way. I would recommend Toxic Criticism to anyone hurting from the sting of criticism, whether it came from another person or is self-inflicted.” – Alisa Wolf
Excerpted from Eric Maisel’s podcast series on Toxic Criticism on his show Your Purpose-Centered Life:
You can see why committing to eliminating self-criticism necessarily returns you to the six keys we discussed in earlier episodes:
• You refrain from criticizing yourself because self-criticism does not help you achieve your meaning-making goals or aid you in leading an authentic life.
• You refrain from criticizing yourself because self-criticism does nothing to help you appraise situations.
• You refrain from criticizing yourself because self-criticism is in conflict with the philosophical, phlegmatic attitude you have decided to adopt.
• You refrain from criticizing yourself because you recognize that self-criticism is maladaptive self-talk that only serves to weaken and incapacitate you.
• You refrain from criticizing yourself because you conclude that self-criticism is a shadowy part of your personality and one of the ways you avoid facing up to life’s challenges.
• You refrain from criticizing yourself because you understand that self-criticism is not a motivator but a disincentive to act.
Insofar as you are prone to criticize yourself, you will also be prone to interpret innocent or neutral comments as criticism, magnify the importance of mild criticism, and in a variety of ways pile criticism on your own head. There is nothing noble or righteous about self-criticism. Let it go.